I’m reading the Star Magazine web site today. And I’m chortling (gleeful laughing)
over what the Star was reporting. I’ve already given you the information concerning
the fact that the wunderkins were conceived in this “glassy” manner. But I can’t stop laughing over the reasons that supposedly Brangelina give for the in vitro conceptions. A quote from Jolie in a interview that she gave last year she said, “If we’re going to have ten kids, we’d like to raise them while we’re young.” - (Oh boy!-somebody give me a whiskey, straight up!). Seriously though, if you ponder her words, it’s like she’s saying that she doesn’t want to take the TIME to have them. What parents have children sooo close together?!!And also- where’s the fire??! Can it be a tad bit of laziness that drives her?
The great funny though, comes from an anonymous doctor from Madison Avenue (New
York- who didn’t treat Angelina) says that “despite conceiving naturally –the old
fashioned way — with Shiloh, there may have been issues with encroaching middle
age for the partners. Like shooting blanks, “the physician theorized. I don’t believe that I can say it better.Bon Voyage!
Well what’s making the rounds on websites today? On aol, they have as one of their cover clicks, “32 YEAR OLD ACTRESS FINALLY TALKS ABOUT PREGNANCY!” The operative word here is ‘finally’. I instinctively knewthat this was about madame ‘zola’ jolie. There were only a few paragraphs about her MIRACULOUS INCEPTION ,when during the Irag talks she “felt kicks” (hey jolie, want to feel MY kicks?).
Sure as you can say (’ Oh bradley!- yee,haw!), the corners of her puffy lips turn into a knowing smile, and with out missing a beat, starts talking about the heartbreak of poverty in post- Hussein Iraq. she is no longer just a humanitarian, no longer just a child advocate and adopter supreme. she’s entered into another phase of her world conquest . A plan so intricate, lurid-and SCARY, that it rivals all the horror flicks fused from one start of a movie to the ending of another (over and over again - ad infinitus - a little latin for you, zola!), she’s the (her new title ) “World Baby Incubatress!”. “Oh dark mother,
we suckle at your smokey teats!” (quote from FRIENDS).
Yes, jolie is UNBELIEVEABLE! Am I unfair?? Not if you take into account all the times we (the public) have had to swallow the undigestable tripe and titles that she holds for our memorization ;-or for the umpteenth picture we’ve had to behold ( and I’m telling you now, that there’s a “wheel of fortune” in their house that they spin , that has all the destinations where they are going to walk, ride or fly to !). Yes-, there are a zillion pictures of her and brad as she carrys her pre- babies,- I could post them for you. but I really can’t take looking at them. I’m going to scream if I see her in that brown and beige chiffon nightmare. I’ve seen it a ZiLLION times, - enough already!!!
I’m speaking the truth here, there will come a day when ALL OF US will be sucked into a black hole somewhere, and the ONLY WAY we can come back to earth is THROUGH jolie (birthin’-wise). HHHHELP!!!!!
Okay, that’s a cheap shot at Jolie’s “tanks” . And it’s a shameless rip-off of the commercial which coined this very famous phrase. I was stumbling around and found this little tidbit on dotspotter.com. It’s a pic of Pitt making a drooly face over angie’s mammaries. Whether or not he was really doing that, I must say that jolie is busting out all over! She was never small in the bosom area to begin with, but with the twin pregnancy, it’s like going from kumquats to watermelons! And I’m sure that pitt is having a good time. But if he were smart, he would rent space on them. I mean, companies could put their logos on her breast, and they would make money galore. Do you know that there are people who have rented space for advertisers on their bald heads? some on their face?! It’s crazy! But jolie would capture quite a bit of moola. And I’m sure that pitt wouldn’t mind. In fact, I’ve got a couple of ideas for advertising. Either one will do. Anyhow, later!
