I Hate Brangelina

Have you ever seen a two petal flower? Well, you’re looking at one right now. Pretty
soon, there’ll be two more petals added (if one can believe the stories that there are
two girls in angelina’s pouch. This little (and I mean little) story comes out of The Huffington Post’s entertainment section, on line. I was going through the usual haunts
(oh- what a word to use!), and found it.

The article goes on to say that jolie was out somewhere in Monaco , in their city store
shopping for her little angelinas, buying Grand Prix shirts. I could mention the store she bought them at, but it’s really not pertinent to my article. This article goes on to say, that “Zee and Shi” came from ballet class- both were wearing ballet flats, and ballet- like dresses. And then it ends.

Once again, I have some questions to ask here. How many ballet dresses (or costumes ) do you find for little girls in pitch BLACK?? I don’t think I’ve ever seen that ANYWHERE! And don’t ballet dresses have a lot of frilly tulle (a soft chiffon-y material that flares out
oh- so prettily?). No way do you see that here. What I think is that you’re seeing the very first signs of the indoctrination of future angelina’s being unleashed on the world- Help!
Well you know, these ARE  her daughters (two more coming! oy..!)

Here’s another thing. I don’t mean to be too superstitious (yeah right!), but I’ve heard that you NEVER dress children in black. It’s an unfortunate choice- like wearing a red bullseye on Hunter’s Day. Or scarlett on a wedding dress. You just don’t do it.
Not unless your going to take them to a “Dead” concert, or a trip to Elvira’s Monster Fest!

Oh- I’ve got nothing else left to say. I’m undone!!

The article that I’m commenting on today has to do
with the Life &Style.com story, that’s entitled,
“Protecting Shiloh”. I’ll give it to you in a nutshell. The brangelina household is currently holed up in Austin , Texas while pitt’s filming a
movie ( what for ?- will anyone see it?). But there’s a lot of stuff going on at their Los Feliz , California , home. There’s a petition filed by brad’s top security guard named Richard Malchar ( I wonder if this is the buff security guard that always follows jolie around?? OR- the old fart that shoved some pap in
India ?). At any rate, he’s asking the city of L.A. to make the couples home
and street for their children safer than it is now. Of course , this is a ‘teaser’
story with the rest of the story safely ( there’s that word again!), inside the
magazine on the rack. I’m not going to buy this , not for these two. But I guess
some of you out there will.

I have some advice for brangelina , that I feel will
COMPLETELY resolve their plight. Now this little
golden nugget ( or shall I say ‘nougat’) is given with good intentions , with a happy heart and with full consent from me. What I want to tell you -brad and angelina ( and I want you to listen closely because I don’t give advice freely), is that all you have to do to feel safe, keep your children safe is…….MOVE TO FRANCE- PLEASE!!!!!!

What about that $20 million estate in the south of
France that you were eyeing, huh? What’s up about
that? GO FOR IT, SPREAD YOUR WINGS AND TAKE IT!!!! LOOk brang- you’ll be able to walk freely on the streets without paps- or FANS for that matter following
you; you’ll be able to live in luxury and ride your
bikes along scenic , quaint countrysides with farmers
tending their pastures and wearing little french berets saying stuff like , “bonjour, and bon appetit , bouille , booby, blah , blah”; your children will be able to speak frrronch (french) and maybe english ( if your mommy will let you!). And then there’s that two toilet( twalet) thing that they have happening in France. Of course, you’ll be able to slip over the border into italy, and visit King George ( Clooney).

PLEASE JUST SAY THAT YOU’LL GO!!! CRY-CRY- SNIFFLE!
PLEASSSSSSSE!

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